Temptation City

As children we were taught over and over again about peer pressure.

“Don’t give in.” “Don’t feel pressured to do something you don’t want to do.”

But isn’t interesting that as adults we can’t seem to stop giving into the pressure of others? It’s like the lesson was never really instilled in us.

Maybe because the real concept and idea of giving in wasn’t modeled by our elders AND most likely because no one was talking about the real reason we can’t seem to stop giving in.

The focus was always around the thing tempting us. Around the person tempting us.

But the focus should be around the questions:

• “What am I fearful of losing if I push back?”

• “What am I worried others will think about me?”

• “How will this change the identity of who I am?”

In the moment when temptation is high and we want to go back on our boundaries, these are moments where taking a pause and asking the deep questions is the most important.

Getting real with the deep honest answer, will start to regulate your nervous system to a more rational space to be able to act out your boundary or decision more firmly and purpose. It’ll be harder for someone to talk you into believing them over yourself.

Here is what we have to know and understand when we set boundaries:

Setting boundaries does NOT mean that the temptations will go away.

We can’t expect them to go away, we have to make a choice and stand in ownership of that choice through all the temptations that might come our way.

As time goes on the physical temptations will always be there but your ability to be tempted as strongly by them will begin to decrease

Why?

Not because the thing, experience, person, ect became less desirable, but because you learned that saying no and keeping to your boundary, was safer than you thought. You will start to realize the change you feel internally as you respect your needs and wants AND how those changes inside will start to change your external life.

And that makes it all worth it.

I invite you to write down those 3 questions I wrote at the top somewhere easily accessible. Get comfortable answering them more and more honest each time.

You got this!

xxx Danielle